Still clueless

I’ve never had a dream,an ambition . Even as a kid i was completely clueless as to what i wanted out of life while all my classmates atleast seemed to set their their minds to becoming a doctor or an engineer ,u kno the usual.......but me?i never even bothered to take any real interest in anything to be frank. Doctor ,Engineer never really attracted me in the least .I always thought I’d go with the flow

I was so weak in science when i was in Nasik.I couldn’t even remember simple reactions like carbon-di-oxide turns limewater milky and i used to be one of the toppers in my class. Once our class teacher had asked us a question relating to the subject and i had absolutely no idea what she was talking about.I didn’t even recall her ever teaching us that .The subject felt so alien...it was frightening!My classmates sitting around me answered in one simple sentence and all i could do was gawk at them mouthing the words they were saying too embarrassed at the realization that i didn’t know the head and tail of the subject.

When I moved to Mangalore,i was pleasantly surprised at how i could easily and effortlessly understand and even remember the topics...and thus unknowingly i was drawn to biology.In tenth i was pretty sure i wanted to pursue my studies in that line and even trusted myself not to change my decision..but then as usual i changed it (Mon Dieu!..what was i thinking!).Anyways i thought taking up electronics would be convenient if i wanted to take up a job as an engineer...but little did i kno i would grow to hate the subject

And now,when i’ve finished my exams and knowing that its a high time for me to decide where my future’s gonna lie ,i still remain clueless. Man, what a drag!

Faith Vs Logic

I've been thinking n thinking all day long about what to write for my first real post...(well since i'm new its kinda hard for me)....nothing really worth comes to my mind.As usual life's been as mundane as possible.Since its my first post i guess i got excited and ever since i've been rackign my brains for something good....usually i have those "insights in life" kinda moments when i'm alone....i think about the absurdity of life ,the absurdity of the thoughts people can have and of course the absurdity of people believing in God.
There has always been a part of me that doesn't want to believe in God...i dont kno why...perhaps its because im to lazy to pray -to take time off to do something that's been ingrained into our minds as kids that ive made up reasons to not believe...
but i cant fully accept the face that im actually right just the same...its a very confusing matter ...but then im always confused..
my mom says that we need something believe in to remain sane,to keep on hoping for a better life ,to keep on hoping for good things to happen...i guess that's her take on spirituality...but doesn't that mean she's just using some emtity named God for anchor and not actually believing in his existence as a creator of the universe,our Father as something that is living and not just a thought..isnt that what we've been brought up to believe in..isnt that what our religion teaches us to do
what happens to atheits when they die?where do they go?what happens to people of another faith?was the concept of heaven and hell just a sham that was formed so that people on deathbed don't grieve more because there is no second or third or even a seventh life and that its just the end of the road for them and that there is no going back?.....
they say if u've worked hard ,u'll reap the benefits...is the "God's grace" involved? do the people who believe in God and pray to him the only ones who actually get what they want?is the luck factor too a part of God's gameplan?
was the concept "God" created just to keep people in check, to teach children to diffrentiate between the good from the bad by telling them that if they dont behave god will punish them?
there are so many questions that i want to ask....if i try to answer one another one pops up in my head...i guess i can never know the truth...what might seem logical can turn out to be the erroneous ....,maybe we were never meant to understand who knows there might be someone taking care of heaven and hell after all....

Heya!

Hey guys,this is my first post!

I just started blogging for the heck of it...partly because my bro does it n partly because i have nothing else to do....i have three months of holidays which i'm pretty sure i'll spend doing nothing...so might as well improve my vocab in this process....so until next time

ciao!