Brand New Eyes

Yesterday’s post had a very optimistic feel to it...when compared to several of my previous posts. Its a sad thing to notice in a blog. A dejected person always whining is not how I wanna spend my life. :)

Have you ever tried to forget everything you’ve learnt till now. Your beliefs, your  ideas on various subjects, the memories good or bad associated with different smells or time of the day...etc etc.


I wanna try doing that. You know ,forget what i was before. I’ve  been wishing for sometime to be able to look at things with a new perspective,  with brand new eyes; feel  everything i’ve felt before yet again, and feel for real this time and make my assessment ..........no not assessment but just enjoy them as they come ,good or bad. And make it a whole new experience from the start.


No previous judgements hindering me this time. Now how do i do this????


This means changing my whole life around.Is that even possible.

I read somewhere that it is.

“The whole world is what YOU think of you
So think of it differently and your life will change. “ :) :)

P.S. man! Sem exams on friday and im wasting my tiem getting distracted!!!I really need to get my head in the game :(.....I HATE STUDYING!!!

I wish ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Coll starts from tomo........NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

I don't wanna go back to that place.I don't know what was so horrible with it.Probably the thought if spending another 4-6 months in that hell.God !Everyone says hostel is so much fun,but i just can't seem to remember one thing that made me like that place.And now i have to go back.

Same ol' pretension,same ol' loneliness,same ol' bitchiness,same ol' thoughts about trying to prove i'm not llike somebody else.........I don't think i'l be able to take another dose of it again!

I wish for a new beginning,a new way of life,maybe a little more sync with my thoughts,a little more in touch with myself  ,a little slowing down to see the world around.

I hope i'm able to realize what's truly important to me and NOT waste my time on dramas.

I hope i can be myself  :)

 Just pray for a new start .

Not so magical for me :(

I’ve just reached home from after grocery shopping with my mom and I’m beat.

January 1st,the first day of a brand new year .Oh ,what i had expected and what I got. For me ,who’s become so used to the dullness of life ,sure had an eventful day.  Chemistry ,a subject that i hate, and ironically a part of a branch i wish to study was an exam i had to answer yesterday. Hmmmm, it was horrible!...ok maybe i’m exaggerating a li’l bit but yeah,  wasn’t as if it was a piece of cake either(not that i expected it to be so easy, but still). And i won’t blame myself that i didn’t study in the week i got. I had (well not that much)  coz even if i had it wouldn’t have helped .i had studied after my practical exam and well earnestly .But who knew they would give the questions that i hadn’t studies for :P.Ok maybe this is a lost argument  and I should probably stop babbling.

Anyway then comes the afternoon part where i realize i’ve lost my bsnl sim. It shocks me that I’ve become so irresponsible and lazy. Maybe its the hostel ki hawa doing this to me. Anyway I tell my mom about this in the  evening after i’ve turned my room upside down .She yells at me, describes how I’m gonna die after dad comes to know and i just stand there appalled by my behaviour staring as she goes on telling me about all the complications I’ve created by my act of stupidity.

Today we go and enquire about the procedure and find out we have to give a police complaint .My mom has to come with me coz the sim’s under her name .We have to walk a lot but in the end all goes well. I  get a replacement  .

Now comes the very very bad part .Mom had to tell dad about all this. And all i can do is wish for that part to be magically skipped or um, hope that it never happens.......um  God? pretty please ,with sugar on top?

I had wished ,as i always end up doing,that this year would be a different one,a special one,that the first day would be pleasant,somewhat magical (yeah yeah real life -no magic stuff but what's the harm in wishing?) .but i guess i was wrong...again :(