Grateful.

This year has been everything I'd wished and more.So much more. I get up everyday , sometimes unsure of things, of myself, of all the things the day might bring and I don't let it get to me . If I were me from last year , I would have whined , felt sorry for myself , wallowed in grief convinced that my head was showing me signs that the day would be a disaster. Such was my state.

But now , I get up everyday with a smile.If things go wrong , I know better than to waste my time thinking about it. I have a goal in mind , to reach heights that would make me proud of myself more than anyone else! This year's been charged with energy that seems to be working for my benefit. Opportunities abound . There are lessons to be learnt, people  to be met, their stories to be uncovered, knowledge to be had, information to be hogged on....there's so much out there and so little time. :D

I recently had the chance to meet a wonderfully talented person who's become a great friend of mine. She's portrays qualities that I would very much like to be my own , though she denies being anything that great. Both of us have come to appreciate ourselves , who we are , what we've been through; We agree that life till now has made us who we are and we very well can't stop here ,can we?

You could say that this year has made me wanna be grateful for EVERYTHING. I love what I study! I've never felt that way about my subjects .But I'm so glad I'm one of those lucky ones who would probably get to enjoy her job one day. I have a best friend Fassu who's been there for me through thick and thin and I always wonder how I got so lucky. I absolutely LOVE my mother . Who knew my brain would just click one day , and show me the true meaning of listening , listening to her? I love my freedom in the hostel . I dream of studying abroad and going to places , meeting exciting people and you know what? I'm pretty sure it's gonna happen someday . That's my destiny ;)

I'm grateful and content .

at-home-dont-wanna-study-so-wasting-my-time thoughts :D

been a long time...sometimes i just forget i actually love writing...even when what i write doesnt mean much...i actually started writing or rather discovered i was even interested last year at the time when our college yearbook was asking for articles....

i do wish i could write regularly...n i tell myself whatever excuse i have isnt good enough ....considering im good at making excuses..always saying no ...i just end up irritating the hell out of myself ....

so nowadays i just stay away from my computer...i dont have anything to do....i hate my classes(boooooooooooooooring)......and i just hate the nights i spend after them...i mean i know hostel can be fun....but there's just this void....i mean i can just snap out of it but dont choose too....pathetic is what i feel...

i love being crazy and stupid....that's when i really feel alive ....that's when i enjoy my life the most...that's when i forget to irritate myself with all those thoughts u think when ur so jobless.....

but alas,nowadys there's hardly been a time when i felt that.....should i be blaming the circumstances?......i dunno...

busy busy busy is what i wanna be, i want a tattoo(.....hmmmmm yeah!....)ooooooooh n a guy i like to have as my boyfriend ...i want my best friends to be in the same coll as me ...(fassu ,gautam and alison i do miss aloy)....i wanna be able to piss off my big brother all the time.(hee hee what fun that would be)...i wanna change my hairstyle(im doing it soon enough ,so thank god!)....i wanna stop being lazy(dunno if its ever going to happen in this lifetime ).....i wanna stop sucking at basketball :P....(but hey i think im getting better after i fell :D,i almost kicked ass!)...i wanna laugh n scream n act stupid n first and foremost stop pretending to be good...u kno there are times when u have these angry thoughts in ur head abt a person when he/she is right in front of you but u cant even manage to squeak out even some of them......well i wanna stop doing that.................................
my "want" list just keeps going on ....

ahh.....i feel better already....:)

and now i gtg study for my stupid exams....(ooooooooooooooooh yeah how could i forget...i want exams to be terminated )

buh bye for now :)

My best week till now!

This week’s been AWESOME!!!!

Our college hosted the IGNITE fest which had about a dozen competitions going for three days that were all fun and well, an eye-opener for me. There’s so much talent and my GOD ,I have never thought of Dumb Charades as such a complex game before!

Anyway, I had to make a friend of mine to promise to drag me and make me register at least for one event lest I back down at the last minute. And well she made sure I did just that. I gave my name for DC and bluffmaster , a first for me in both the cases. DC was actually a last minute decision. The same friend and I decided to make a team and go for it. Turned out we sucked at it. But it also brought us a little more closer considering the revelation that we both don’t know anything of pretty much everything.(Okay ,maybe I’m exaggerating there a little bit ,but its close enough to the truth ).Plus it also gave me an opportunity to defy THE EVIL AND OBNOXIOUS BABY (she’s still a pain in my ass) and go to a senior’s room and actually stay there for hours in the forbidden building (or atleast forbidden to me).Ha Ha ,IN YOUR FACE BABY darling!

I improved at DC alright .But it wasn’t good enough coz we looked like total idiots on the stage(which isn’t a first for me btw. I’ve had my moments ).But on a more cheerful thought I’d be happy to tell you I didn’t screw up bluffmaster .Well yeah, i didn’t get selected in either (I’d be a fool to wish that since a few of them including my uncle were too good!).All in all it was a good day for me ,that day. Got to bunk class! Got to see a lot of crazy stuff and the spirit of the contestants was enticing .

Admission ..more like a death sentence

Yesterday I went to get an admission in the college I'll be studying in for the next 4 yrs.The day was well planned by my mom.Well mostly because i didn't seem to give a damn and quite frankly yes I, as usual ,was expecting my mom to do everything since the job at hand required me to get off my arse.And as usual things didn't go according to plan .I hadn't bothered to ask what papers were really needed and my OH SO AWESOME brother (sarcastically , ofcourse) who's studying in the same college ,has a habit of eating half of the info before telling us anything. And so it turned out i needed more papers and well my blood group too!...which was all the more reason for us to fear whether our heads , well, actually my bro's head was gonna stick to his body or if he'd lose it, courtesy mom.
Well coming back to the task at hand ,my mom never tried to find out my blood group when i was a baby (well i think that would have been less painful because then i wont be remembering any of it). But now , at this age ,i wouldnt have even dreamed of going near the hospitals with that weird odour, let alone a needle!......
And so there i was with my one hand stretched out while my other hand over my eyes closed tightly ,as my mom warned me against screaming or crying hysterically because my days as a kid were over .And so all i did when the fat man pierced the needle through my skin was think "I can bear this " repeatedly trying hard to concentrate on something else and guess what , i didn't hurt at all , just a slight pricking sensation that's all and i'm sure that this doesnt sound like a big thing, i mean many people do it.Well after opening my eyes to discover the huge amount of blood (well it looked like that for me) the fat man took from me and since this was the day i was gonna know my blood group i'd say i did a pretty swell job of not running like a lunatic ,out of the place.It might look like i'm hyping this incident, but for some reason i felt that by knowing my blood group i might finally understand who or what i really am.Just a stupid thought ,coz apparently i didn't .

Well everything put aside , we finally managed to reach the college on time and get my admission

Respite from boredom

For days together its been nothing but a daily series of dull mornings including screaming at my brother(cant help it …everytime he’s at home I have headaches ) and friggin’ bleak Tv shows except for the re-runs of “Who’s line is it anyway?”.
So I decided to find solace in Bajpe, a place away from home on the outskirts of Mangalore ,a heavenly place where my dear cousins and grandparents reside. I’ve been coming here ever since I was a little baby. I used to eagerly wait for my exams to get over and come all the way out here to stay .It used to last a month.Every year it used to be a delight to walk around their farm, watching out for snakes (I’m dead scared of ‘em) ,taking those coloured chicks for walks ,playing with their dog, sitting like a duck and waiting patiently for the hen to lay her egg and chasing after them as they cluck away.It used to be an every day routine.
But sadly my days here have become limited- just one week ,that’s it and then its packing my bag time.Nevertheless the trips are worth it ,even if its just for a few day . The serenity of the place ,the fun ,the joys of being with the closest cousins I’ll ever have is like a blessing for a city girl like me and I’m thankful for that.

Ladru and Pedru

I have two cats , two brothers who recently joined our family of six including our pet dog Cookie (named by my mom) . And as it was customary, we thought of several names to name them. One of them is a beautiful orange who is a perfect imitation of his annoying and philandering father and the other is a mixture of grey and black ,a duplicate of his mother .My father finally came up with the names Ladru n Pedru (Konkani for Lazarus and Peter),well because they rhymed in a way.

Me and my mom adore them and i guess in this process the time we spent in indulging Cookie was shortened .Now, we lock her out of the house(Cookie is a she) when our darlings venture into our house each time as if on a mission to discover something new and foreign.They always seem nervous and wary but don’t mind sparring with the long curtains or jumping on the sofa.Their first and I bet their favourite station is our kitchen. They usually tend to get noisy and literally cry like babies when they smell fish or chicken. Pedru is the more daring one who isn’t afraid of sleeping on my bro’s bed, climb the dining table and sometimes even challenge my dog. And Cookie can’t be more J....its her territory of course!

Recently we’ve had more cats eating from their bowl than we would have liked . And we aren’t really proud to say that Ladru n Pedru have turned all mellow and docile because of all the pampering.One among them is a notorious street cat.We haven’t really named him yet .I don’t kno what his problem is but he seems to get pleasure in harassing my kitties.But the most shocking part was seeing the murderous gleam in my mum’s eyes.My goodness!All she spoke of was killing that ugly looking bastard .She had even kept ready some huge stoned ready incase he came back.Once she even managed to hit him right on the head with a huge stick .But she was left fuming with rage when the cat didn’t run fast enough to save his sorry ass. And then she told me to stay alert so that she could this time smash his bones to bits!Wow! i guess one shouldn’t ever make the mistake of messing with a mother.If u do, you might not live to see another day.